This is the time we have. Just now, just this moment. The past is gone and the future hasn't happened yet. We only have now. It can be very hard to stay in the present. Often we don't notice what…

Tell me, “Learn to accept what you can't change.” Tell me, “This is a life changing disease. What's so hard about working with you is that you are so high functioning.” But don't deny me the struggle to keep going,…

This is the time to enjoy life – day to day, minute to minute. Not worry. Not stress. The time to appreciate the sky, whether it’s clear, foggy, cloudy or smoggy, to listen for the birds, the kingfisher whose tweet…

I am not thinking of what I did wrong. It was clear. I did what I did because I was high, I was drunk and the hatred I felt for you came out without effort, without strain. The hatred came…

Going through old piles of writing...this, from 1988...yes...1988....it feels like i have written forever and forever and forever , and my stacks of old writing tell me that feeling has a basis in reality.......... The Road to Riches 7/7/1988 Thursday…

The man I'm married to shoots his friend in the head and then asks me, Should we kill him? holding the gun to the back of the other man's head. Why a second shot is required, I don't know. We…

Can we ever truly know? I mean, can we ever truly know who we are? I think the worst affliction, far worse than not knowing- is not WANTING to know....to NOT search...to NOT be curious. We must always be curious,…

There are a lot of memories that I'd rather not have, but I think there are many more that I wish I had been able to hold on to. I've never had a great memory. For example, many of the…

Is it possible to forget the last time I visited Boise, how stormy your face looked? We argued at dinner about whether our family cabin was a real asset. I said seeing it as such might mean losing it. What…

Life….my life….hell, all lives….are filled with unwanted memories. There is no escaping that exhausting truth: our brains ( our minds?) record it all, like the most efficient and powerful camera ever created. …..because our brain/mind is indeed the most powerful…

Denial is so easy to slip into. I've done it many times throughout my life. Right now I've been shifting between denial and facing the facts of my current situation. When I first tripped and fell on a raised part…