When I was teaching young actors at NYU, for all those dozen years, i made sure to implant in them the notion that there is no such thing, really, as competition.
If the part is meant for you – I’d tell them -then no matter who else was auditioning for the role, you would be given it: karma, fate, call it what you will: i fully believed ( and still do) that if the part is meant to be yours, you will book the job.
I have never been comfortable with competition.
I cannot watch football or any other sports because i always feel really bad for the team that loses.
Because i know what it feels like to lose, and i want to spare anyone else the bad feelings of not getting what they strive so mightily for….i imagine the beefy players in the dressing room crying because after all their might and heroic efforts, they lost.
And in all the times i auditioned actors for plays i was directing, i made sure the
ones who were not getting the part were taken care of, and i would do my best to make them feel valued and appreciated.
I had my own share of traumas when it came to auditioning, and in fact, when i wanted one particular role so badly, i couldn’t bear to hear the news, i turned off my phone machine, drank three shots of Scotch and went to bed, wanting to avoid all bad news.
As it turns out, i booked that job, but i was so tender at the thought of not booking it, i couldn’t bear to be awake to hear any bad news. And that was the role i got my Tony nomination for: in QUILTERS, 1985 supporting actress in a Musical..
For all the competition in the world, and all the people who feel they must compete to make it in the world, i offer my sympathy and care.I hate competition and yet we live in a world where competition seems to be all there is.
I want to offer my apologies to any and all people i may have hurt along the way: i meant no harm. I only saw what I wanted all to see, and that, in human terms, has its limits.
We- I – meant no harm…i was just doing my job, or what I thought was my job.
We all do the best we can, right?