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The first thing that comes to mind with “lived on love” is my cycling buddy Martha telling me, “I’ll never forget the expression on your face as you were holding Kenji’s face in your hands, screaming ‘Don’t leave me, don’t leave me.'”

I’ll never forget kneeling next to him as he lay on the road, unconscious, no pulse, the absolute terror I felt as I screamed, “Don’t leave me!”

Between that moment neither Martha nor I will ever forget and the no pulse realization, a perfect stranger, a runner who – seeing Kenji fall off his bike and crash on the road – yelled (like some ex-military guy), “Man down!” ran over to Kenji and me. I was frantically digging in the stuffed back pocket of my cycling shirt, knowing how urgent it was to get through to 911. When I realized my phone was going to take too much time to dig out, I asked him if he’d call 911, which he did instantly. He was so on top of it. Immediately I was answering the 911 guy’s questions. While also feeling for his pulse and feeling nothing. “Do you feel a pulse?” I asked that oh-so-reliable and cool-headed stranger and he said, “No.” When the 911 guy heard our exchange, he asked me, “Do you know how to do CPR?” “No.” “Well, I’m going to teach you.” And he did, moment by moment, second by second. Counting along with me, having me count with him. When I got ahead of him, he knew it and slowed me down to his count.

The oh-so-dependable guy was right there, on the other side of Kenji’s body, who knows what that guy was supposed to be doing, it didn’t matter, he was here, doing this.

The next thing I knew, I was standing on the side of the road next to my other fellow cyclist Dane, I had no memory of walking there or being shepherded there. I could see Martha doing the CPR to the 911 guy’s count. She’s a retired teacher, apparently teachers learn how to do CPR and Martha knew how to do it. Later, when I asked her why she took over, she said, “You were getting tired.” Then, next thing I was aware of, Mr. Dependable had taken over from her and was doing the CPR.

When the EMTs and their electric shockers arrived, they shocked him three times. Put him into the ambulance, put me into the passenger seat (not allowed according to the CHP guy who left shortly after declaring that and was immediately ignored), and off we went to the trauma center.

As we started driving, the EMT guy said in a very unemotional way, “You did good. He’s not out the woods yet, but you did good.”